* An oak tree on the ground looks four times bigger than it did standing up.
* When house hunting, look for closets with lots of leg room.
* AA, C and D are the only alphabet we need (think batteries).
* Chainsaw-wielding-men are nothing to be afraid of.
* You can't spell "priceless" without I-C-E.
* Gasoline is a value at any price.
* Candlelight is better than botox — it takes years off your appearance.
* No matter how hard the wind blows, roadside campaign signs will survive.