More Humor for Dreaded Wednesday

Six married men will be dropped on an island with one car and 4 kids each for six weeks. Each kid will play two sports and either take music or dance classes. There is no fast food.

Each man must take care of his 4 kids, keep his assigned house clean, correct all homework, complete science projects, cook, do laundry, and pay a list of "pretend" bills with not enough money and work at least 40 hours per week. In addition...each man will have to budget in money for groceries each week.

Each man must also take each child to a doctor's appointment, a dentist appointment, and an appointment for a haircut. He must also make cookies or cupcakes for a social function.

Each man will be responsible for decorating his own assigned house, planting flowers outside and keep it presentable at all times.

The men will only have access to television when the kids are asleep and all chores are done. There is only one TV between them and there is NO REMOTE! Each father will be required to know all of the words to every stupid song that comes on TV and the name of each and every repulsive character on cartoons.

The men must shave their legs, wear makeup daily, which they will apply themselves either while driving or making four lunches. They must adorn themselves with jewelry, wear uncomfortable yet stylish shoes, keep their nails polished and eyebrows groomed.

During one of the six weeks, they will have to endure severe stomach cramps, back aches, and have extreme, unexplained mood swings but never once complain or slow down from other duties.

They must attend weekly PTA meetings, church, and find time at least once to spend the afternoon at the park or a similar setting. He will need to pray with the children each night, bathe them, dress them, brush their teeth and comb their hair each morning by 7:00.

A test will be given at the end of the six weeks, and each father will be required to know all of the following information: each child's birthday, height, weight, shoe size, clothes size and doctor's name. Also the child's weight at birth, length, and time of birth, each child's favorite color, middle name, favorite snack, favorite song, favorite drink, favorite toy, biggest fear and what they want to be when they grow up.

They must clean up after their sick children at 3:00 a.m. and then spend the remainder of the day tending to that child and waiting on them hand and foot until they are better.

Each man will have to make an Indian hut model with six toothpicks, a tortilla and one marker; and get a 4 year old to eat a serving of peas.

The kids vote them off the island based on performance. The last man wins only if...he still has enough energy to be intimate with his spouse at a moments notice.

If the last man does win, he can play the game over and over and over again for the next 18-25 years...eventually earning the right to be called

Mother

Posted by vw bug at November 9, 2005 07:19 AM | TrackBack