June 14, 2007

Vacation Bible School - NOT

Never ever again will I volunteer to help at a VBS. Never. And we are doing an 'Avalanche Ranch' VBS. I thought I was going to be a glorified line leader. Taking 5 or 6 kids from one bible study area to another. Waiting for them to do their thing and lead them to the next one. Uhhhh. NOT. I have to participate and be with my 'team'. Not only that, I ended up with one 6 yr old, two 7 yr olds and two 10 yr olds. Not necessarily the best mix in my mind.

Add to that, two of the younger ones are 'touchy' kids. They want me to hold their hands, or they are consistently sitting right beside me, almost in my lap, or touching my arm or back. Trust me, this is NOT my cup of tea. I hold there hands, I smile and continue to let them sit close to me. It is only till Friday, it is only till Friday... Bou, you can stop laughing now.

Here is where Bou and I do differ. I have no problem standing up, dancing, singing and being an absolute fool in front of the kids and adults and having fun. Won't even make my stomach twinge. Being around people in general is fine, I am an extrovert by nature. Ahhh, here is how we are the same.. Being around small people who demand a lot of attention is NOT fine. I am not a teacher for a reason. This is WHY!!! Don't TOUCH ME! And even I can get sensory overload when every time someone says "God is Real", "God is Strong", "God is with us" every single person (about 70 per classroom) has to shout "WaaaHooo" at the top of their lungs. In small rooms where this is said every couple of minutes is enough to make me want to go to the bathroom and never come out.

Yaa... the best example is the hairdryer. We are in this classroom made for 20, with all 70 of us sitting beside each other on the floor, no where an empty spot. They have a boy stand up with a hairdryer and try to balance a ping pong ball on it. It falls off. They talk about how it is not "Strong like God". Wahoo. How you have to be connected with God because "God is Strong". Wahoo. They plug the hairdryer in the wall... now it is connected to the power... like we can connect to God and we know "God is Strong". Wahoo. They show the ping pong ball now staying balanced above the hairdryer. It now has the strength to hold the ping pong ball up because it is connected to the power. We can get the ability to hold ourselves up when we connect to God because "God is Strong". Wahoo. Ok, so we did 4 wahoos in under 5 minutes. Trust me it didn't take them long on the example and speech. The idea... was cool. Something visible for the kids to relate to... The wahoos. Nope. Stop it.

No kidding. Every couple of minutes we are all having to scream Wahoo. Oh, it gets better. Even the young ones are being taught to scream wahoo. That means on the way home, in my house and every time I turn around... my boys are saying one of the phrases to make the other one scream wahoo. I was talking to Tink about VBS after I got home... and I whispered to her I wanted to tell the boys to "F.cking SHUT UP on the Waahoos" when she said "God can hear you when you whisper." We both started laughing. Yes, I shouted wahoo during VBS. No, I haven't stopped my kids from saying it. No, I didn't freak when we had to sit in these small classrooms... but by the end of the day... even I want to run away.

Posted by vw bug at June 14, 2007 06:55 AM | TrackBack

Hi VW Honey,


I swear my brother made me did it......

Posted by: Bobby at June 14, 2007 05:46 AM

I can't get over it! Wahoo! VBS is next week for us. We are doing the "Take the Plunge" VBS, which means lots of water activities, wet kids, crying kids, soggy kids . . . Wahoo!

Posted by: oddybobo at June 14, 2007 08:27 AM

Sounds like hell! WaHOOOO!!! LOL!

Posted by: pam at June 14, 2007 12:21 PM

Wahoo! I don't like the touchy feely either. And noise overload, ugh! I'm going to put a link and explain more to this with what my week is going to be like next week. Wahoo!

Posted by: Maranda Rites at June 14, 2007 03:08 PM

God Sucks! Wahooo! Heh. Kidding, just kidding!

This was great stuff... You know damn well when I see the boys next I'll be waving my hands over my head yelling, "Wahoo!"... You know... just to get them started. ;-)

I can handle the touchy... I can't handle the noise. The noise, the crying, the whining, the 'He Touched Me!" And the perpetual motion... you can't escape it. Jumping, running, hands flying, even out of your peripheral vision. Bah. No.

Posted by: Bou at June 14, 2007 03:17 PM

Oh honey I'm so sorry you're going through this.

Posted by: michele at June 14, 2007 03:34 PM

Pax vobiscum, et cum spiritu tuum! Now you know why I prefer to live and worship in my cloister!

Posted by: The Gray Monk at June 15, 2007 03:18 AM


I'm pretty sure you get a really good spot in heaven for doing this.

Posted by: Marie at June 15, 2007 11:57 AM

what in the hell were you thinking


Oh yeah....


Posted by: armywifetoddlermom at June 15, 2007 04:16 PM

Our VBS was Avalanche Ranch, too. Luckily my kids are too young!

Posted by: Jody at June 18, 2007 08:42 PM