Okay, Bug has bugged out for awhile since she opted a friend's timeshare in Orlando. Last I heard she had gotten them all lost on their way back to the condo.
Did I ever tell you NOT to take directions from Bug? Well don't. Pan and I went down to the Big O one time and she met us there. We were all going out that night and between Bug and Pan we ended up going around a pond for nearly half an hour. (Pan doesn't have a compass in his brain either, unless, of course he is playing a video game.)
So there we are driving round and round and round and round and round this pond while they were trying to figure how to get out. Finally I had to step in (not literally) and tell them to take the next right, the next left and finally another right where we ended up nearly right in front of the place we wanted to be.
So if you plan on meeting the Bug in Orlando, don't get directions from her.
A woman was helping her husband set up his computer, and at the appropriate point in the process, told him that he would now need to enter a password - "Something he will use to log on to the computer."
The husband was in a rather amorous mood and figured he would try For the shock effect to bring this to his wife's attention. So, when the computer asked him to enter his password, he made it plainly obvious to his wife that he was keying in
P...
E...
N...
I.
S.
His wife fell off her chair laughing when the computer replied:
***PASSWORD REJECTED. NOT LONG ENOUGH***
An Irishman, a Mexican and a Blonde Guy were doing construction work on scaffolding on the 20th floor of a building.
They were eating lunch and the Irishman said, "Corned beef and cabbage! If I get corned beef and cabbage one more time for lunch, I'm going to jump off this building."
The Mexican opened his lunch box and exclaimed, "Burritos again! If I get burritos one more time I'm going to jump off, too."
The blond opened his lunch and said, " Bologna again! If I get a bologna sandwich one more time, I'm jumping too."
The next day, the Irishman opened his lunch box, saw corned beef and cabbage, and jumped to his death.
The Mexican opened his lunch, saw a burrito, and jumped, too.
The blonde guy opened his lunch, saw the bologna and jumped to his death as well.
At the funeral, the Irishman's wife was weeping.She said, "If I'd known how really tired he was of corned beef and cabbage, I never would have given it to him again!"
The Mexican's wife also wept and said, "I could have given him tacos or enchiladas! I didn't realize he hated burritos so much."
(Oh this is GOOD!!)
Everyone turned and stared at the blonde's wife. The blonde's wife said,
"Don't look at me. He makes his own lunch."