June 30, 2006

Mom To The Rescue ... sorta

While out back with the boys, I hear a cat meowing. Sounds like it is caught or hurt or has a sore throat... no matter, it doesn't sound good. The neighbors aren't home and it sounds like it is coming from their yard. Hmmm... they don't have a cat.

After a minute, I decide to go on a rescue mission. I tell the boys I'll be right back and hop over the fence. Now trying to find this noise isn't easy. First the neighbors have a batting area made of loose netting. And a fenced in pool. And bushes, lots of bushes.

After calling for the 'kitty' and trying to find the noise... I found it. I was very happy that it was at the neighbors and not my house. It was a frog trying to be eaten by a snake. Ok, the snake had a hold of a little piece of the frog and wasn't letting go. The snake's head was the size of a dime and the frog was as big as my fist. Very high aspirations for the snake.

Standing there, I decided it might be better if the snake dragged the frog elsewhere... I didn't want to hear it getting eaten and chances were the frog really was too big for the snake. Being the normal typical me, I touched the snake to make it move. It moved all right. And let go of the frog in the process.

I rescued one frog... sorta...

Posted by vw bug at 06:03 AM | Comments (9) | TrackBack

June 29, 2006

Bug Story of a Doomed Date

Tink is at it again. Telling outlandish stories about me. Ok, truthful stories. But I don't consider Pan and I on a Date in that story. And I doubt Pan did either since he left me. GRIN. Hence, it could not be doomed. ;-) But you never know. Then again, I was always getting in trouble with Pan around... and I have a feeling more of these stories are on their way.

Why oh why did one of my best friends marry my sister???

My kids are going to learn so much about their mom... one of these days I guess I better write up about the shells and the dead fish before Tink decides I have waited too long and does it with many embellishments.

Posted by vw bug at 12:30 PM | Comments (2) | TrackBack

Talk about Cuteness

Tot was laying on the floor being 'cute'... here are a couple of pictures...

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Gotta love that hair!

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Posted by vw bug at 06:13 AM | Comments (4) | TrackBack

June 28, 2006

Humor for Dreaded Wednesday

Some old, some new... I still love this stuff.


* I used to eat a lot of natural foods until I learned that most people die of natural causes.

· Gardening Rule: When weeding, the best way to make sure you are removing a weed and not a valuable plant is to pull on it. If it comes out of the ground easily, it is a valuable plant.

· The easiest way to find something lost around the house is to buy a replacement.

· Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway.

· There are two kinds of pedestrians: the quick and the dead.

· Life is sexually transmitted.

· Health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

· The only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth.

· Some people are like Slinkies. Not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you see one tumble down the stairs.

· Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.

· Have you noticed since everyone has a camcorder these days no one talks about seeing UFOs like they used to?

· Whenever I feel blue, I start breathing again.

· All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.

· In the 60's, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.

· Politics is supposed to be the second oldest profession. I have come to realize that it bears a very close resemblance to the first.

· How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire?

· Who was the first person to say, "See that chicken there? I'm gonna eat the next thing that comes outta its butt."

· Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?

· Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is?

· Why does your OB-GYN leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway?

· If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that Acme crap, why didn't he just buy dinner?

· If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests?

· If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what is baby oil made from?

· If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons?

· Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup?

· Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?

· Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster?

. Do you ever wonder why you come read my Wednesday humor?

Posted by vw bug at 06:24 AM | Comments (4) | TrackBack

More Humor for Dreaded Wednesday

This one had me laughing out loud (LOL)!

In a small town, an elderly couple had been dating each other for long time. At the urging of their friends, they decided it was finally time for marriage.

Before the wedding, they went out to dinner and had a long conversation regarding how their marriage might work. They discussed finances, living arrangements and so on. Finally, the old gentleman decided it was time to broach the subject of their physical relationship. "How do you feel about sex?" he asked, rather trustingly. "Well," she said, responding very carefully, "I'd have to say... I would like it infrequently." The old gentleman sat quietly for a moment, then over his glasses, he looked her in the eye and casually asked ............

"Is that one word or two?"

Posted by vw bug at 06:05 AM | Comments (4) | TrackBack

June 27, 2006

Joe Cool and the Thief

Tot found my sunglasses early one morning. Go ahead and click on the picture and enlarge it. Notice the very cool socks, pj bottoms and shirt. Nope, nothing matches. Sigh.

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And later that day, he found them again... notice the little third hand that has appeared in the picture...

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And that means the Thief Tater had to have his picture taken as well...

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Posted by vw bug at 06:10 AM | Comments (2) | TrackBack

June 26, 2006

Carnival of Recipes 97

Carnival of the Recipes #97 is now available for your viewing pleasure. It's a special Road Trip Edition full of recipes to travel tastily. Whether you plan to walk, bike, boat, fly, ride a train or drive a car, there's something you can pack along to make your journey a little bit tastier. Thanks to booklore for doing all the work this week.

And thanks again to Shawn Lea for writing my text for me.

From vw: It is worth going over there just to read it. Go check it out!

Posted by vw bug at 06:48 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

And for the Rest of the Story

Seems Tink has had a bad weekend. And it ended with her installing an Alternator on her husband's car. Hmphf. Any other female I would probably feel some measure of sympathy having to work on a car engine. Not Tink. She worked at a car shop for many years. And yes, she helped the guys fix the cars. She knows her way around the engine of a car. She is a woman of many talents.

And while cruising the blog-o-sphere this morning, I found How Computers Work at Grouchy Old Cripple... and then saw it again at Bou's. I'm sure I'll see a few more links to it before the days out. It's great!

Posted by vw bug at 06:16 AM | Comments (3) | TrackBack

Art Project 101a

Some days I wonder what goes through my mind... clue, paint, boys... yaa... I lost my mind...

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Living in Florida does have a tendency towards ocean scenes. Particularly when you have tons of shells. I'm open to any other project my boys can do with shells. I have a lot more to get rid of somehow.

Posted by vw bug at 06:00 AM | Comments (5) | TrackBack

June 25, 2006

Growing Boys

My sons have been very tired lately. Tired enough to take a nap or two. And if their eating habits show me what it is going to be like as they get older, I need to get 2 jobs just to feed these boys. Seriously. Tot ate a pork chop, rice and 3 (you read that right) bowls of oatmeal for dinner. For the life of me I can't remember all the stuff he ate during the day... but that night for a snack... yes he wanted a snack... he ate about 9 or 10 crackers... some with peanut butter on them. And Tater? 3 apples 30 minutes before dinner, a pork chop, rice, corn and he also had a snack that night.

Either I need 2 jobs or I need to learn how to grow fruits and vegies in large quantities. Luckily this is a growth spurt and should slow down. It is just weird that they are both going through it at the same time. Phew...

Posted by vw bug at 07:05 AM | Comments (7) | TrackBack

June 23, 2006

Papa and the Comet

A little background... over the next couple of months I will be telling stories about my parents on the weekends. This blog is my 'scrapbook'. For when I get old and want to remember stuff and for when my kids get older and I want to blackmail them (just joking on the blackmailing... I have enough stuff without the blog - GRIN). Hence, I want to remember stories about my mom and dad. Mom has kindly agreed to write a few up for me. Here is the first one:

One of the things my family use to do when I was growing up, was get up in the middle of the night to see 'shooting stars' or special cosmic activities. And here is one of my favorite stories about how crazy our family can be about it - from my mom (Mammaw)...

Two o'clock in the morning, Papa's at work, the kids and I are asleep. The phone rings, it's Papa telling me if I want to see the comet it is really bright ( I think it was Kohoutek) . So I get up, go out in the yard and try to find it. Finally I find it, a tiny speck with a tiny tail. He was flying 20,000 feet in the air, I was on the ground surrounded by street lights.
Posted by vw bug at 08:03 PM | Comments (1) | TrackBack

How Is The Garden?

Yaa... no water and then lots of it does odd things to a garden. Like this wonderful cucumber plant:

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Then there are the tomato plants we picked up at Disney World. Literally. They were laying on the ground and I picked them up. It was some free ones that Home Depot gave away as part of the Garden weekend. Guess someone dropped their plants and decided to let them die on the walkway. Their bad... and my good. Note that there is a tomato on the plant!

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Posted by vw bug at 08:32 AM | Comments (6) | TrackBack

Adventures of Super Pickle Boy (2)

Being a super hero is a difficult job. Jumping off the back of couches; chasing your brother, the bad guy, all over the house; watching the SPD Power Rangers; and eating lots of food... just wears a Super Pickle Boy out. Even though I just had to keep on going... I had to color that last picture to show exactly where the bad guys are hiding... just one more...

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Posted by vw bug at 08:24 AM | Comments (3) | TrackBack

June 22, 2006

Funny Stories

Seems my sister is having a tip-top time spinning a good tale. I guess she got all the writing abilities in my family. Go enjoy THIS STORY about how as a mother she got SCS. Or THIS STORY about her hubby's antics as a 4 year old.

Posted by vw bug at 01:53 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Happy Blogversary Grandpappy Harvey

Never to be one on time making announcements or anything of that nature... Here is a late Happy Blogvesary to Grandpappy Harvey! He has a request for his blogversary at THIS POST. Go add your story to it.

Posted by vw bug at 01:08 PM | Comments (1) | TrackBack

Time To Play

Going to the playground is always entertaining. For the climbing of the 'ladder', I could only get a picture of Tater on it. Seems every time Tot got on it, my camera wouldn't click. Yes, they both climb these 'ladders' and usually at fast rates. Gotta add to those grey hairs.

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And 'hiding' from mom is always fun:

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Click on More Pawprints to see the rest of the pictures!

How to walk down a slide:

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Come climb with me mommy! Now!

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Look at me! Honest, I won't let go this time.

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Mom is busy up on the top of a play area taking pictures... watch me climb climb climb...

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Posted by vw bug at 09:51 AM | Comments (4) | TrackBack

June 21, 2006

Humor for Dreaded Wednesday

It had been a long time since I saw this joke... and could not resist the 'tater tot' humor. Enjoy!

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Well, Girl Potato and Boy Potato had eyes for each other, and finally they got married, and had a little sweet potato, which they called 'Yam.'

Of course, they wanted the best for Yam.

When it was time, they told her about the facts of life.

They warned her about going out and getting half-baked, so she wouldn't get accidentally mashed, and get a bad name for herself like 'Hot Potato,' and end up with a bunch of Tater Tots.

Yam said not to worry, no Spud would get her into the sack and make a rotten potato out of her!

But on the other hand she wouldn't stay home and become a Couch Potato either.

She would get plenty of exercise so as not to be skinny like her Shoestring cousins.

When she went off to Europe , Mr. and Mrs. Potato told Yam to watch out for the hard-boiled guys from Ireland

And the greasy guys from France called the French Fries. And when she went out west, to watch out for the Indians so she wouldn't get scalloped.

Yam said she would stay on the straight and narrow and wouldn't associate with those high class Yukon Golds, or the ones from the other side of the tracks who advertise their trade on all the trucks that say, 'Frito Lay.'

Mr. and Mrs. Potato sent Yam to Idaho P.U. (that's Potato University ) so that when she graduated she'd really be in the Chips.

But in spite of all they did for her, one-day Yam came home and announced she was going to marry Tom Brokaw.

Tom Brokaw!

Mr. and Mrs. Potato were very upset.

They told Yam she couldn't possibly marry Tom Brokaw because he's just.......

Are you ready for this?

Are you sure?


OK! Here it is!



Posted by vw bug at 09:28 AM | Comments (3) | TrackBack

June 20, 2006

Monkey See, Mommy Do

I couldn't resist. I saw everyone else doing it, so had to join in on the fun. Here's my bumper sticker.

Your Bumper Sticker Should Be
Gettin' humped at the pump
What Bumper Sticker Should Be On Your Car?

Can you believe I got this for a minivan???

Posted by vw bug at 06:21 PM | Comments (6) | TrackBack


I was busy helping both boys make the cupcakes to take pictures. But I thought you would get a kick out of the colors they chose for the different cupcakes. And how they got 'mixed' as they went along.

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And here is a better view:

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Posted by vw bug at 08:19 AM | Comments (3) | TrackBack


Lately I have been targeted for some charities. And they are getting smarter. Only those I care about are sending info to me.

This one is free to you, but will give money to the Cancer Research and Prevention Foundation. A quote from the 'spreading the word' website:

By ordering a free Make the Connection bracelet kit, you will be helping to advance cervical cancer education and outreach. For every pair of bracelet kits ordered, Merck will donate one dollar to Cancer Research and Prevention Foundation, up to $100,000, for cervical cancer awareness and screening programs among medically underserved women.

At the end of 'spreading the word' article is the Order a Free Bracelet button. Go press it and help donate a dollar.

Posted by vw bug at 07:31 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

June 19, 2006

How Not To Take Pictures

While trying to take a picture for Father's day... we got some interesting poses. I should mention that the orange paper has "Happy Father's Day from Tater and Tot, 2006" on it. Since you will be seeing the back that has some other decorations.

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And it pretty much continued that way. When I did get them to hold up the sign, it covered their faces. Next year I spend the $5 and go to Walmart.

Posted by vw bug at 06:19 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack

June 18, 2006

Coffee Cup

Just for Harvey's wanting of a coffee cup on blog father's day...

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It's available on e-bay...

Posted by vw bug at 04:46 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack

June 17, 2006

Been A Teensy Bit Busy

Mom finally gets a computer that is working and I didn't have time to post today. Didn't have one lined up and didn't realized how busy I was going to be. Took some pictures of our activities (like making cupcakes for Father's day)... but haven't had time to upload them.

Hopefully tomorrow night will settle down and be easier. Ohhh, I don't have anything ready for tomorrow morning to post. I'll have to wing it.

Posted by vw bug at 08:09 PM | Comments (3) | TrackBack

June 16, 2006

Mud Puddle Fun

Nothing is better than a good mud puddle. Here are my children enjoying the last 5 minutes... (click to enlarge)

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It does make me wonder how much mud they ate...

Posted by vw bug at 05:37 AM | Comments (10) | TrackBack

June 15, 2006

What Living Room?

As I was picking up toys for the umpteenth time, an odd thought crossed my mind. What does a living room look like when you don't have kids? I can't remember. It has only been about 4 years and I don't remember. Why? Because mine always seems to look similar to this:

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We have a 'family' room as well. That is where the TV, couch and loveseat are located. And toys.

What does your living room look like?

Posted by vw bug at 06:21 AM | Comments (13) | TrackBack

Good Info On Spammers and Techniques To Help Stop It

Somedays I actually get to read some stuff on the web. Today I read an article titled "How Spammers Get Your Email Address". It had interesting information like:

So, to find email addresses at a large ISP, it's enough to combine the domain name with a random user name. Chances are both "asdf1@hotmailcom" and "asdf2@hotmail.com" exist.

To beat this kind of spammer attack,

* use long and difficult addresses.

And it gave a link on what was long and difficult addresses.

It gives other good information about how to put encoded email addresses in your posts and so on. Enjoy.

Posted by vw bug at 05:20 AM | Comments (2) | TrackBack

Commenting Frustrations

Lately I have not been commenting much. Here is an example of why:

Your comment submission failed for the following reasons:

Your comment could not be submitted due to questionable content: about com

Please correct the error in the form below, then press Post to post your comment.

And this was my comment:

While you are at it, how about coming down here and moving all the 'junk' that came in our loads of dirt. ;-)

And when I mention it to a member of our Bad Example Family, he answered it in a good traditional way:

Well damn you and your dirty mouth!
Posted by vw bug at 04:46 AM | Comments (5) | TrackBack

June 14, 2006

Bug Stories

Lately there has been a lot of bug stories on the blogs. Tink talks about an ant invasion. Contagion puts on his General uniform and goes after a swarm of the hostiles (Yellow Jackets) that tried to engulfed him.

And then I couldn't believe my eyes. Bug pr0n. I just couldn't stop reading it.

Go enjoy some bug stories.

Posted by vw bug at 08:58 PM | Comments (1) | TrackBack

More Humor for Dreaded Wednesday

and from Prochein Amy, an oldie but goodie!

Women are like apples on trees. The best ones are at the
top of the tree. Most men don't want to reach for the good ones
because they are afraid of falling and getting hurt. Instead, they
sometimes take the apples from the ground that aren't as good, but
easy. The apples at the top think something is wrong with them,
when in reality, they're amazing. They just have to wait for the
right man to come along, the one who is brave enough to climb all
the way to the top of the tree.

Now Men.... Men are like a fine wine. They begin as grapes, and
it's up to women to stomp the shit out of them until they turn into
something acceptable to have dinner with.

Posted by vw bug at 06:27 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack

Humor for Dreaded Wednesday

Interesting Observation

1. The sport of choice for the urban poor is BASKETBALL

2 The sport of choice for maintenance level employees is BOWLING

3 The sport of choice for front-line workers is FOOTBALL.

4 The sport of choice for supervisors is BASEBALL.

5 The sport of choice for middle management is TENNIS.


6 The sport of choice for corporate executives and officers is GOLF.


The higher you go in the corporate structure,

the smaller your balls become.

Posted by vw bug at 05:24 AM | Comments (6) | TrackBack

June 13, 2006

Tater / Tot's Garden

Took the picture before we started to get rain. Surprising that the garden is surviving. Must say Tater shocked Dad... when Tater went over and was pulling weeds out of it yesterday. Yes, weeds, not the plants. But getting those boys to water it??? Wasn't happening. Good thing we are getting rain.

In a couple of days, I'll post a picture of the garden now that it has been raining for 3 days in a row. Bet you see a big difference.

Posted by vw bug at 08:32 AM | Comments (4) | TrackBack

Categories Available

Thanks to CalTech Girl... I now have my categories listed on the side of my blog. You click on a category and you get everything I have marked in that category. Yipeee... no more searching on a particular recipe...

Posted by vw bug at 07:17 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

June 12, 2006

Some Changes Have Happened

Uhhh. I guess I forgot to warn everyone. I'm making changes to my blog. I'm going to add a few categories and move things around. You'll notice that the blog roll is now at the bottom. There are two... just like before. Except the Bad Example Family is the blogroll that Harvey made for his 'family' to use. I kept missing people and have finally given up on hand adding them. The other list is the one for those not in his family. I hand make that list. If you are missing, please leave a comment or send me an email. Now is the time. I'm making changes.

More to come over the following week.

Posted by vw bug at 05:16 PM | Comments (2) | TrackBack

Grass Crazy

Not everyone wanted rain... but I really did. Here are some pictures of the amount of sod we got... ugh...

Garden is right behind me... nope, no sod there... ran out of money.

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Walking a little further... here is more of the back / side of the house:

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And then standing in the back and shooting the picture towards the front... and yes, that is one of the two sprinklers I am trying to use to water the whole bunch of new sod.

Posted by vw bug at 06:36 AM | Comments (4) | TrackBack

June 11, 2006

Generic Recipes

Thanks to Shawn Lea for again giving me the words to get this out...

Carnival of the Recipes #95 is now available for your viewing pleasure. It's a Generic Version bursting with delicious, ambrosial and nectareous recipes for all of us to try.

And it looks like I have 2 new recipes to put out in the future... finally!!! Until then, go check out the Carnival!

Posted by vw bug at 09:39 PM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

June 10, 2006

Ready Set Go ->Hurricane Season

Go ahead and take a look at our first tropical storm HERE.

And I promised to link to all of those that got the picture correct in Art 101... And the winners are (in the order they answered):

Oddybobo of Bobo Blogger
CalTechGirl of Not Exactly Rocket Science
Marie of PractiGal

Posted by vw bug at 11:56 AM | Comments (3) | TrackBack

Little Tidbits

Nothing like teaching your sons manners to have it backfire on you. I was trying to get the kids to pick up their stuff. Looking straight at Tater and in a very commanding voice, I told him to "Pick up your shoes and put them away". Without missing a beat, he looked me in the eye and said, "Mom, you have to say please." ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHH.

And I am trying something new in our household. For 30 minutes after lunch, the kids must play in their rooms. They can play together or separately, but in one of their rooms. One day, I hear a lot of laughter. A lot. I go back to see what is happening. They are in Tot's room. I had left out the saline solution I use on Tot. They were taking turns squirting it up their noses. Oh geeze.

Anyone else want to shoot the kid underwear industry? Why did they put the Super Heros on the butt? Huh? The kids can't see them that way. How many times do I have to convince Tater to put them on the right way???

Yes, life is always exciting in our household.

Posted by vw bug at 11:54 AM | Comments (4) | TrackBack

June 09, 2006

Linky Love

There have been so many good posts lately! I haven't had time to link to them all... but today, instead of playing with the kids or doing housework... I'm going to go find some of those links and share them with you!!!

First, for the geeks... want to know more about installing linux (for those who are a little frightened by it - like me)... start HERE at Physics Geek's place.

For some great humor... Ok, my twisted kind of humor... Denny at Grouchy Old Cripple has Stick Figures.. Post 1, Post 2 (my favorite), Post 3 and there are a whole lot more...

And this story Sticks wrote about "K" having 'the talk' with her 8 year old daughter had me in stitches.

GuyK at really showed me a different meaning for our language when I read about Old West Sayings.

Practigal's boy sleeping with trucks brought back memories of Tot sleeping with a toy shovel.

And while I have never been a soap opera watcher, I am hooked on Patriot Xeno's peek into eHarmony (this is linked to one of the latest posts on it, there are more before this one).

Phew, didn't realize how long this post was getting. One more and I'll quit... if you have not been over to check out Richmond's brain benders... then you can look at Monday's HERE. She tries to post one every day. Problem is getting in fast enough to post the right answer first... well... if it's a math problem. Otherwise, I'm just increasing my vocabulary. ;-)

Have a great weekend and enjoy these posts!

Posted by vw bug at 09:20 AM | Comments (3) | TrackBack

Art Project 101

Some days I question my sanity. I have decided over the summer we would have 'class time' twice a week. Only to discover last week that Tater wanted more... and I didn't have more. Tonight, I will be making copies of exercises for him and Tot to do. Did I mention the monkey see, monkey do? Though Tot does not get the same out of it, he wants the same pages and wants to do the same thing. In fact here is their latest art project:

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Your name splashed up on my next post for the first person who can guess which one belongs to which kid.

Good luck!

Posted by vw bug at 06:57 AM | Comments (3) | TrackBack

June 08, 2006

It's True. Sad, but True

I'm not so sure having my sister with a blog is the best idea. She is starting to tell stories about me. Yaa, Contagion, looks like you are going to hear more about me in the future.

Seems Pan told her the story about going golfing with me. The part about the animals is true. And for the record it was 2 squirrels and 1 bird.

At least he hasn't told her about playing raquet ball with me.

Posted by vw bug at 11:43 AM | Comments (0) | TrackBack

Hot Wheels

When I did my "5 Meme", I mentioned I carry a hot wheels car in my purse. Harvey had the gumption to ask me which one and wanted details. Off I went to find the car and truck I carry. Two, because I have two boys. I found crayons, shot records, Rimadyl for the dog and more... but no cars!!! Uh ohhh. This is a BAD thing.

Now I have selected two new cars to put into my purse. And one of them is the truck that was actually in my purse before... a Ford F350 Super Duty Pick Up Truck (made by Tonka in 2002). On the side it says Tonka Tractor Supply. The other is a Cadillac V16 (made by Hot Wheels in 2003).

Pictures to be gotten later when the kids are asleep.

Posted by vw bug at 10:49 AM | Comments (3) | TrackBack

Another Grey Hair

Seems that Tot has decided that climbing is the way to keep me hopping. And here is the latest escapade:

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I didn't get a picture of him on the kitchen counter. Had to get him off asap. Yaa... life is definitely busy lately. Sick or not, those kids can motate.

Posted by vw bug at 06:48 AM | Comments (4) | TrackBack

June 07, 2006

More Humor for Dreaded Wednesday

Another Oldie but Goodie!

The wife comes home early and finds her husband in their master bedroom making love to a beautiful, sexy young lady!

"You unfaithful, disrespectful pig! What are you doing? How dare you do this to me, your ever-faithful wife, the mother of your children! I'm leaving this house, and I want a divorce!"

The husband replies "Wait, Wait a minute! Before you leave, at least listen to what happened."

"Hmm, I don't know. Well, it'll be the last thing I will hear from you so make it fast, you unfaithful pig!"

The husband begins to tell his story . . .

"While I was driving home, this young lady asked for a ride. I saw her, so defenseless that I allowed her in my car. I noticed that she was very thin, not well dressed, and very dirty. She cried that she had not eaten for 3 days.

With great compassion I brought her home and warmed up the enchiladas that I made for you last night. The ones you wouldn't eat because you are afraid that you will gain weight. The poor little thing practically devoured them."

"Since she was very dirty, I asked if she wanted to take a shower. While she was showering, I noticed her clothes were dirty and full of holes so I put them in the trash. Since she needed clothes, I gave her the pair of jeans that you have had for a few years. The ones you can no longer wear because they're too tight on you. I also gave her the blouse I gave to you on our anniversary. The one you don't wear because I don't have good taste."

"I gave her the pullover that my sister gave you for Christmas. The one that you won't wear just to annoy her. And I gave her the boots that you bought at that expensive boutique. The ones you never wore again after you saw your co-worker wearing the same pair."

The husband continues his story . .

"The young woman was very grateful to me and I walked her to the door. When we reached the door, she turned, and with tears streaming from her eyes,she asked me:

"Sir, do you have anything else that your wife doesn't use?"

Posted by vw bug at 06:07 AM | Comments (2) | TrackBack

Humor for Dreaded Wednesday

Oldies but goodies

1. Don't imagine you can change a man, unless he's in diapers.

2. What do you do if your boyfriend walks-out? ... You shut the door.

3. If they put a man on the moon ... they should be able to put them all up there.

4. Never let your man's mind wander - it's too little to be out alone.

5. Go for younger men. You might as well ... they never mature anyway.

6. Men are all the same - they just have different faces, so that you can tell them apart.

7. Definition of a bachelor; a man who has missed the opportunity to make some woman miserable.

8. Women don't make fools of men ... most of them are the do-it-yourself types.

9. Best way to get a man to do something, is to suggest they are too old for it.

10. Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener.

11. If you want a committed man, look in a mental hospital.

12. The children of Israel wandered around the desert for 40 years. Even in biblical times, men wouldn't ask for directions.

13. If he asks what sort of books you're interested in, tell him checkbooks.

14. Remember a sense of humor does not mean that you tell him jokes, it means that you laugh at his.

15. Sadly, all men are created equal.

Posted by vw bug at 05:53 AM | Comments (2) | TrackBack

June 06, 2006

TV Week Edition of CoR

Carnival of the Recipes #94 is now available for your viewing pleasure. It's a special TV Week Edition chock full of great recipes to eat along with your favorite TV show. (Words plagerized from Shawn Lea)

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Rainy Days

I was happy that we started to get rain. The kids loved it. In the 80s (F), a big puddle, and mom says YES.

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Then we ordered and got sod. It hasn't rained since.

Posted by vw bug at 05:23 AM | Comments (6) | TrackBack

June 05, 2006

Five, Fuenf, Cinco

I was tagged by wRitErsbLock. UPDATE and tagged by Prochein Amy as well! Here it is:

5 things in my fridge
Cream Cheese

5 items in my closet:
Christmas decorations

5 items in my purse:
Hot Wheels car
Purell purse size

5 items in my car:
car seats
kids books

5 people to tag:
It looks like everyone has been tag'd. If you have not been tag'd, let me know. I'll be glad to tag you and update this post!!!

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A Wish For the Future

When I saw my boys fighting over the vacuum cleaner I was so happy... and then reality hit... they are only 2 and 3 years old. But I have blackmail pictures for later.. enjoy!

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Posted by vw bug at 05:15 AM | Comments (3) | TrackBack

June 03, 2006

To Bring a Smile to Women

and possibly some insight to men...

Tink sent me a link to Musings on being a Woman by Stacey. I laughed as I read it. And by the end... I was laughing really hard. And now when I go shopping, I'm going to look for a box as well.

Posted by vw bug at 07:43 PM | Comments (1) | TrackBack

It is a Whale

Great guess everyone. I am surprized that the word whale is 'questionable content' but you never know. ;-)

Been busy last two nights with croupy kid and bronchitis kid. Not much posting today. Will try to get something out tomorrow.

Have a great weekend and get sleep... those of us lacking can tell you it is well worth enjoying it now!!!

Posted by vw bug at 06:32 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack

June 02, 2006

Can You Guess?

I'm not sure if I should post this picture or not... I think my family might give me a hard time about how my son draws better than I do. But let's see if it is true. Can you guess what Tater drew? or you can come up with an entertaining caption if you want...

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He told me, so I know the answer... but I would have guessed it right.

Posted by vw bug at 06:19 AM | Comments (8) | TrackBack

June 01, 2006

Whack the Mole, sorta

There is a new game in the house. When mom is busy doing something (dishes, laundry, cleaning toilets), children must run around like mad men. Tater then will put out an arm and 'whack' his brother as they run past one another. Tot has not quite caught on to how this works... that and his brother's arms are longer... for now.

Watch mom get pissed off, put children in time out or possible just one child (hint hint - rhymes later), let mom cool off and then repeat. It's going to be a l.o.n.g summer.

Posted by vw bug at 05:14 AM | Comments (5) | TrackBack

You Gotta Be Kidding!

Amazing where kids can fall asleep. One minute they are eating, the next they are sleeping. Good hiding place for it. Took mom a while to find him.

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Posted by vw bug at 05:09 AM | Comments (3) | TrackBack