January 31, 2008

Peek a Boo

While on the walk with Tot, we ran into a horse that played peek-a-boo with us. It was fun...

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Making Tracks

Tot and I went for a walk the other day..... the dirt road was perfect for making tracks:

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And if the feet work, the hands will work just as well...

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January 30, 2008

Humor for Dreaded Wednesday

New Mathematical Equivalencies

1. Ratio of an igloo's circumference to its diameter = Eskimo pi
2. 2000 pounds of Chinese soup = Won ton
3. 1 millionth of a mouthwash = 1 micro Scope
4. Time between slipping on a peel and smacking the pavement = 1 bananosecond
5. Weight an evangelist carries with God = 1 billigram
6. Time it takes to sail 220 yards at 1 nautical mile per hour = Knotfurlong
7. 16.5 feet of silver in the Twilight Zone = 1 Rod Sterling
8. Half of a large intestine = 1 semicolon
9. 1,000,000 aches = 1 megahurtz
10. Basic unit of laryngitis = 1 hoarsepower
11. Shortest distance between two jokes = A straight line
12. 453.6 graham crackers = 1 pound cake
13. 1 million microphones = 1 megaphone
14. 1 million bicycles = 2 megacycles
15. 365.25 days = 1 unicycle
16. 2000 mockingbirds = 2 kilomockingbird
17. 52 cards = 1 decacards
18. 1000 kilograms of falling figs = 1 FigNewton
19. 1000 milliliters of wet socks = 1 literhosen
20. 1 millionth of a fish = 1 microfiche
21. 1 trillion pins = 1 terrapin
22. 10 rations = 1 decoration
23. 100 rations = 1 C-ration
24. 2 monograms = 1 diagram
25. 8 nickels = 2 paradigms
26. 4 statute miles of intravenous surgical tubing at Yale University Hospital = 1 IV League
27. 100 Senators = Not 1 decision

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January 29, 2008

Happy Is Doing Fine

Life is never dull at the bug's house. Happy had surgery yesterday. They removed a tumor from his belly that was hanging down and started having problems.

After we got home we took off the collar. Folks, there is NO WAY that Happy can lick that sore. It is under right front leg... back just a little. And that collar was HUGE... I think my house is a wreck now... with that collar on, it would have been worse.

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And he looks soooo pitiful because we won't feed him or give him water. The doctor warned us that he might throw up if he had anything. We did end up giving him some water and food later... just a small amount of water, wait 30 minutes, a little more water, wait 30 minutes, 10 pieces of food... you get the idea... but this was just too cute a face when he was laying by his dishes and not allowed to have anything.

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Sparkling Little Diamonds Out On the Limb

It was foggy and overcast the other day. I brought out the camera to take pictures of Tot and was amazed at what I saw around me. I went on a spiderweb hunt.

It reminded me of little diamonds sparkling when I saw the webs. I'm not sure the pictures do them justice. Click to enlarge...

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And in the middle of it was the small symmetrical web you are use to seeing...

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Fairly large web that was just gorgeous...

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January 28, 2008

Wheee Fun! (or is that Wii?)

We had a friend visit while Mamaw was here and he played the Wii with my boys. Yaa... it was cute. We had to move some tables and chairs around to trap Tater. He moves ALL over the place. Particularly in front of whoever is winning if it is not him. GRIN

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January 25, 2008

Electricity and Stamina

From Richmond...

Your Superpower Should Be Manipulating Electricity
You're highly reactive, energetic, and super charged.
If the occasion calls for it, you can go from 0 to 60 in a split second.
But you don't harness your energy unless you truly need to.
And because of this, people are often surprised by what you are capable of.

Why you would be a good superhero: You have the stamina to fight enemies for days

Your biggest problem as a superhero: As with your normal life, people would continue to underestimate you
What Should Your Superpower Be?
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January 24, 2008

Florida Weather

When I was growing up in Florida I learned to watch the weather... particularly in January and February. It was always crazy. As I get older I find that it hasn't changed. Today in the 80s, tonight in the high 50s. The only thing that has changed is my frustrations towards it since I have a son with asthma. I think we should move to some island that doesn't get hurricanes. ;-)

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Five Years of Age

I was reading THIS POST over at Sticks and saw this line:

The happiest of people don't necessarily have the best of everything; they just make the most of everything that comes along their way.

Lately I have not been making the most of what comes my way. It is not the end of the world what has been going on... the normal stuff... money, time, and sleep (or at least for me this is an ongoing item)... but then throw in a five year old.

My angel. He has gotten to be difficult. Not just a little. I mean temper tandrum, screaming, PITA difficult. I am glad he is growing and trying to become more independent. I am not happy with the talking back, getting cheeky with me and the other things that are happening. This boy who had only gotten enough spankings that they could be counted on one hand, now have enough I can't count. And this is AFTER we have done time outs, taking away Wii and computer privileges.

It makes it harder to find the good stories to write about him when you spend the day correcting him. I'm working on it. It may take me a little more time but I'm working on it.

Interesting enough, Bou mentioned she had some problems with her boys at this age... the person I carpool with to take the boys to school is having a similar problem with her son now. The only other issue I have is that Tot is now trying a few of these 'No's out as well. Good thing I'm strong enough to take them both on... but again, it makes for little blog fodder.

How many times can I write how I told my son to pick up his shoes and put them away, get told NO and put him in time out. After time out, tell him to pick up his shoes and put them away now, get told NO and take away the Wii and computer time. Put the shoes away now. NO. Fine, time for a spanking... suddenly the shoes disappear. Now mind you... my mom freaked when she saw me spank my child... It was whack on the butt with the clothes on... THAT WAS IT??? was her response. From the way Tater acted she thought I must really use a belt or something. Nope. Amazing huh?

It gets old but must be consistent and must be done. I will not have a child that grows into a teenager with this kind of disrespect for me. Not going to happen. Besides it is just dangerous to have a child that doesn't listen. What if a car is barreling down the road and I tell him to get out of the road? NO! Yaa... not the response you want to hear.

Hence, if you have any thoughts or ideas or support... I'm all eyes (or ears). But it will work out one way or another. Just not a lot to blog about while it is happening.

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January 23, 2008

More Humor for Dreaded Wednesday

For parents:


I was packing for my business trip and my three-year-old daughter was having a wonderful time playing on the bed. At one point she said, “Daddy, look at this”, and stuck out two of her fingers.

Trying to keep her entertained, I reached out and stuck her tiny fingers in my mouth and said, “Daddy's gonna eat your fingers,” pretending to eat them.

I went back to packing, looked up again and my daughter was standing on the bed staring at her fingers with a devastated look on her face.

I said, “What's wrong, honey?”

She replied, “What happened to my booger?”


New take on an old joke...

Last night my sister and I were sitting in the den and I said to her, "I never want to live in a vegetative state, dependent on some machine and fluids from a bottle to keep me alive. That would be no quality of life at all, If that ever happens, just pull the plug."

So she got up, unplugged the computer, and threw out my wine.
She's such a bitch.

Posted by vw bug at 08:23 AM | Comments (2) | TrackBack

Humor for Dreaded Wednesday

Two atoms walk out of a bar. "Oh dear, I've left my electrons back in the bar." "Are you sure?" "I'm positive."

A neutron walks into a bar. "How much for a beer?" "For you? No charge."

Four fonts walk into a bar The barman says "Hey you, get outta here! We don't want your type in here."

A jumper-cable walks into a bar. The barman says "I'll serve you, but don't start anything."

A sandwich walks into a bar. The barman says "Sorry we don't serve food in here."

Oldie but goodie:
Why is the number 10 afraid of seven?

-- because seven ate nine.

What is "pi"?

Mathematician: Pi is the number expressing the relationship between the
circumference of a circle and its diameter.

Physicist: Pi is 3.1415927 plus or minus 0.00000005

Engineer: Pi is about 3.

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January 22, 2008

Sweet Nothings

Sometime it is hard to remember things like this:

Not that you ever would but when someone tells their best friend about their difficult day, or how tricky relationships have been, or that they have a jolly good life in most regards except financially, not only do they relive the unpleasantness, but they commission all the elements to project into their future whatever they've been claiming. Besides, you'd never say, "jolly."

Better to whisper sweet nothings -
The Universe

Which is why you haven't seen a lot of posting here lately. Life has been difficult with Tater and I'm working on solutions. I may post to ask for help sooner or later... but for now... I'm working on it. On another note, I have a nice job that fits into my schedule and is allowing me some play money. Yaaaa!

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Tot Cleans Up

This won't last too much longer:

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He loves watching it flush:

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Mom learned a lesson... notice the toilet paper on the back of the toilet? They had buy one get one half off of toilet paper. I missed that it was a 'Mega Roll'. Yaa... doesn't fit on the toilet paper holder until you have used over half of it. Also, you don't leave it sitting there while your youngest cleans the toilet. It didn't fall in, because I moved it away from there when I saw it in motion. Tot was very enthusiastic about cleaning... and things got bumped. Phew.

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January 21, 2008

I Got Nothing

It is Martin Luther King's Day... it should be something special to post about. I have wonderful stories from Mamaw's visit. Other stories about living with a 5 year old... And yet... I have nothing. Ok, I found this picture and it made me happy I am living in South Florida...

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January 20, 2008


Yesterday was horrible. Just horrible. I sent my mother home on a plane that was going through Atlanta. It was snowing and sleeting. Oh... did I mention that my mother H.A.T.E.S to fly? That in the past I was only able to get her here via Ft. Lauderdale because it was a direct flight? After much discussion about it was much cheaper through Atlanta and it would come to a closer airport. 50 miles closer. She decided to give it a try. Uh... I really thought that if she could reach me yesterday that she would have killed me. Luckily she was soooo happy to be going home, the reality of what I scheduled for her didn't hit home. Phew...

It started when we reached the airport here and it was delayed 40 minutes. This cut back on the amount of time she had in the Atlanta airport to get to the other plane. And it was delayed even more. Yikes. Then I relaxed when I saw it was making up time in the air. It was only 15 minutes late from the initial time. It also said her plane in Atlanta was still scheduled to leave on time. It lied.

She sat on the tarmac for over 2 1/2 hours. Waiting to be de-iced. Yep, they put them on the plane and made them wait. Oh boy. I was sooo happy when I saw that it was finally in the air. Until then... I basically freaked. Part of that was due to sleep deprivation. Tot is having asthma issues. Yet, a lot of it was that guilty feeling of convincing my mom to go through Atlanta.

Yes, she is an adult. Yes, she can logically figure out what she wants. She is extremely smart and able to handle herself. She has traveled a lot (which is why she doesn't want to travel now). Still...

She made it home and is very happy. Me too. That she didn't have to spend the night in Atlanta. I would hear about that for yeas to come if it had happened! Phew.

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January 18, 2008

Last Full Day

It is the last full day of Mammaw at my house. And it is a day off of school for the boys. Wonder where she is going to go hide? hahahaha. Life is never boring at this house. It has been fantastic with her here. Just the little things. Finding the dishes done, the boys beds made, and the laundry done!!! That is awesome.

I'll be sad when she is gone, but I know she needs to get some quiet time and back to her own routine. She also needs to get back to see the caterpillars that are turning into butterflies ... she saved the caterpillars before she left. My sister, ddpups, has been taking care of them. Very cool.

Off to reading how to make ice cream, and making sure we have enough stuff to make cupcakes... maybe angel food cake as well...

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January 17, 2008


Saw THIS POST at Lemon Stand and it just struck me as very funny... and every time I think about it... I still smile.

Been busy the last couple of days, we are cleaning out my garage... not much to post about but that it sucks. Oh, and AmVets loves me. I gave them a ton of really nice stuff.

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January 16, 2008

Humor for Dreaded Wednesday

Crime doesn't pay...Does that mean my job is a crime?

This dog, is dog, a dog, good dog, way dog, to dog, keep dog, an dog, idiot dog, busy dog, for dog, 20 dog, seconds dog! ... Now read without the word dog.

ALGEBRA: A weapon of math destruction.

What did the elephant say to the naked man?
How do you breathe through that thing?

What happened when the Pope went to Mount Olive?
Popeye beat the crap outta him.

Q: What does a blonde owl say?
A: What, what?

Why did Tigger stick his head in the toilet?
He was looking for Pooh!

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January 15, 2008

Who is suppose to read?

Seems it has been an interesting couple of days... Dad was gone and Mamaw took over the night reading... In fact, Mamaw says Tot read to her every night instead of vice versa.

Particularly the Clone Wars Adventures... there is one story called Creature Comfort that is Tot's favorite. He read it to Mamaw... in it there is a part where the creatures are running and it has the words "plok" about 15 times. When Tot reads it... "plok" is said about 50 times... or so Mamaw claims. She also informed me that he was very dramatic when he read and should become an actor. Yep, that's my boy!

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January 14, 2008

What's your name?

My older son is actually getting to be pretty funny. While driving back from the airport, I hear something like this conversation in the back of the car:

Tater: Tot, Tot!
Tot: What?
Tater: What's your name?
Tot: Tot
Tater: What's this? (he is pointing to his nose)
Tot: Your nose
Tater: What's in my hand?
Tot: Fingers?
Tater: NO, what's in my hand?
Tot: I don't know
Tater: Nothing is in my hand, what's in my hand???
Tot: Nothing.
Tater: And the answer is... Tot nose nothing... hahahahaha
Tot: That's NOT Funny!

Actually I snickered.

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January 11, 2008

Cooking with Tot

Seems after seeing the Pulmonologist yesterday morning.... we have discovered the fever Tot has been running since Monday is a sinus infection. The good news... his lungs are clear. The bad news... no sleep for 4 nights makes for a grumpy mom and son. Hopefully the antibiotics will kick in by tonight and all will be happy again in the bug household.

Ahhh... but Mamaw has been busy with Tot. Here they are finishing up a cake mix:

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And last night they made dumplings together... that was too funny. Those were the toughest dumplings I have ever tried. We threw them out and added rice to that chicken. Today we decorate the cakes... and tomorrow hubby leaves for a couple of days. yaa... life is never boring in the bug household.

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January 10, 2008

Who Me?

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Yaa. Guilty and caught at it.

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January 09, 2008

More Humor for Dreaded Wednesday

Once Mrs. Smith and Mrs. Green met during a party. After an hour talking and drinking Mrs. Smith told her friend, "They call my husband 'The Exorcist.'" With a great surprise Mrs. Green asked her, "Why?"

She replied, "At every party we attend, he soon gets rid of all the spirits."

Posted by vw bug at 06:01 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack

Humor for Dreaded Wednesday

Twas the Month after Christmas
The following was shared by surfer Cathy W.

'Twas the month after Christmas, and all through the house,
Nothing would fit me, not even a blouse.

The cookies I'd nibbled, the eggnog I'd taste,
At the holiday parties had gone to my waist.

When I got on the scales there arose such a number!
When I walked to the store (less a walk than a lumber).

I'd remember the marvelous meals I'd prepared,
The gravies and sauces and beef nicely rared.

The wine and the rum balls, the bread and the cheese,
And the way I'd never said, "No thank you, please."

As I dressed myself in my husband's old shirt,
And prepared once again to do battle with dirt.

I said to myself, as I only can,
"You can't spend a winter disguised as a man!"

So--away with the last of the sour cream dip,
Get rid of the fruit cake, every cracker and chip.

Every last bit of food that I like must be banished,
'Till all the additional ounces have vanished.

I won't have a cookie--not even a lick,
I'll want only to chew on a long celery stick.

I won't have hot biscuits, or corn bread, or pie,
I'll munch on a carrot and quietly cry.

I'm hungry, I'm lonesome, and life is a bore,
But isn't that what January is for?

Unable to giggle, no longer a riot,
Happy New Year to all and to all a good diet!

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January 08, 2008

3:17, 3:18, 3:19, 3:20

There are times when you wish you had not taught your son to read a digital clock. Like at 3am in the morning. Tot has been 'sick' for over a week now. I had planned on calling the doctor and taking him back in this morning. And at 1 something am last night he called me to his room. He was running a 103F temperature. Ugh. I gave him motrin, turned on his fan, took off his pajama bottoms and waited 45 minutes. It was 104F. #$%^*#&... off to bath with a screaming child. No mom No Mom, I WANT TO SLEEP. Nope, no sleep for you... at least not yet.

We got the temp down. Along with a dose of Tylenol to help. And at 3:17am, he started reading the clock to me. Ugh. Go to sleep. Nope, wasn't going to happen yet. He read it every minute until 3:22am. When we finally started talking about Star Wars and Mario brothers. Finally at 4:30am the bugger went to sleep. I crawled back into my bed after making sure his temp was down (100F). And the @#$ alarm went off at 5:30am. Oh bother. Yep, got up, showered and started breakfast for Tater. It has been a long stressful 2 weeks and now school has started...

Won't be commenting much in the next couple of days. Reading? Yep... I need the outside stimulation. Commenting... takes too much time. Luckily I have some posts ready for the next couple of days. I'm here... sorta...

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Geniuses and 5 year olds

Mamaw has declared that Pokemon is only played by geniuses or 5 year olds. And she is neither. GRIN. But I got a picture proving she was playing the game!!!

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Green Yard?

It is January 2008 and my grass is a wonderful green color. Sigh. Glad we made it to P'cola for Christmas... at least my boys got to experience a cold Christmas. Particularly since it has been so warm here.

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January 07, 2008

Semen or Kittens?

Seems my blog-son is having an interesting time discussing semen. Yep, you ought to go over. It made me smile.

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Made a scrapbook page...

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The template is from Lisa Minor.
The mask is from pumpkin ridge creations.
The elements and paper is from Creative Victorian.

The boys still love dinosaurs. Need to make a page of Tot. Just been too busy. I did notice Tink made a scrapbook page of Tot though... check it out HERE but you must scroll down to see it. And it is a great post since it has all sorts of space stuff on it.

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January 05, 2008

Something New To Try

Tink sent me this link and now I want to try it!!!

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January 04, 2008

What Is The Story Behind This?

My sister, ddpups, took this picture. I would have loved to have known what was going through his mind...

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Good Mom, Bad Game Player

Tot told me he thought I was a good mom... and on the same day Tater tells me "You don't know how to play this game"... twice!!! Once for Star Wars and once for Pokemon. Ahhhh... the fun of having children. Here are some more pictures from Christmas...

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January 03, 2008


It has been fun but difficult the last week. Not much to post. No sleep makes for poor posting. Here is a picture from Christmas at Mamaw's of me with my boys....

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January 02, 2008

More Humor for Dreaded Wednesday

Since Election time is in full swing... how about some dumb laws? Pan sent me THIS LINK... here is what you can read at the end of the article:

The ridiculous

An assortment of seemingly crazy state driving laws exists and can be found easily across the Internet. Most of these examples are sourced from newspapers and come from the site www.dumblaws.com, whose editors did not respond to a call for comment. Here goes:

In California, no vehicle without a driver may exceed 60 miles per hour.

In Florida, if an elephant, goat or alligator is left tied to a parking meter, the parking fee has to be paid just as it would for a vehicle.

In Montana, it is illegal to have a sheep in the cab of your truck without a chaperone.

In Oregon, a door on a car may not be left open longer than necessary.

In Tennessee, it is illegal shoot any game other than whales from a moving automobile.

Yep, I live in Florida...

Posted by vw bug at 05:10 AM | Comments (6) | TrackBack

Humor for Dreaded Wednesday

Ok folks... I finally got 5 hours sleep last night. Before that Tot was having asthma problems (which are always worse at night)... and Happy dog decided that barking at 2am was fun. None of which helped me with sleeping more than 2 hours at a shot. Why am I telling you this? Because my sense of humor is ... just awful when I have had no sleep. I'm posting some humor that is NSFW (Not safe for work) in the More Pawprints. Very funny to me at this moment and thought I would share. And something safe for work... visit this Old Fart and read his predictions for the new year... Not sure if my favorite is that there will be 29 days in February or that two teams will play each other in the NFL. LOL! Ok Ok... so he is going to get me for calling him old... Part of the fun... enjoy the below the pawprints humor!

And hopefully in a day or two, I'll be up to commenting versus just lurking and reading. Thanks to everyone that has stopped by... i know it has been hard to comment lately. Happy New Year and thank you.

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There are a couple more with nude body parts... email me if you want me to send them to you.

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January 01, 2008

The Start of the New Year

Pan sent me some humor... in return for a horrible pun I sent him. I figured what better way to start the year? Humor!!!

Q: What do you call Mother Teresa now that she's in Heaven?
A: Nun of the above.

Q: What do you call a cow spying on another one?
A: A steak out.

There are two apples lying in a crate.
The first one says, "Man, my head hurts!"
The second one screams "EEK! A talking apple!"

Two cows are discussing artificial insemination.
Daisy tells Betsy that she's had it done.
"Really?" says Betsy. "I don't believe you!"
"It's true!" replies Daisy. "No bull!"

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